Yesterday I caught myself saying a number of variations of:
I AM HAVING THE WORST DAY.
I started stomping my feet a bit and frowning. I growled at the girls and I ate pizza and a magnum for dinner because I had the WORST DAY and I totally deserved it.
I woke up this morning feeling a little ashamed. Because the night before my WORST DAY I was busy signing petitions and sharing things on facebook and getting so so so very angry about the terrible situation asylum seekers are finding themselves in Australia’s abysmal detention centres. I listened to the voices of real asylum seekers as they rang to inform our Asylum Seeker Resource Centre about what has been going on at Manus Island the past few days. I read articles about shit shit shit stuff. I thought about the pregnant women being separated from their small children to be brought to the mainland to give birth, often in late pregnancy with dubious support prior. I thought about our Government thinking that this is an OK thing to do. I thought about all the people I know who don’t give a shit or don’t care to research this issue or don’t care enough to look outside their own lives and care about someone else’s.
And then I had the nerve to wake up yesterday and go about my day as if it was the WORST DAY. Which it absolutely, totally and completely was not.
Sure, I may have had a few hiccups in the morning. I may have come up against some challenges.
Sure, I may have left two folders worth of confidential kinder documents on the roof of my car while I buckled up the Pixie and drove off only to realise when I got home that they were gone and have to drive back to find said documents and USB stick sprawled over the main road, run over and ripped and broken, over an area of about 100 metres and then have to run around like a mad woman collecting papers and stopping traffic and being beeped at by a very large truck and angry truck driver man while my children cried in the car. It wasn’t the best.
But it most definitely was NOT the WORST.
I woke up this morning, in a warm cosy bed, I went to a yoga class and was stretched and pulled in all directions by my teacher. I meditated and went home. I fed my two delicious girls breakfast and took them out for a coffee. I gave my big girl vitamin c and good things for her cold. I went to the shops and bought us food and nourishment. I came home and tucked them into warm beds and sat and had a cup of tea. I checked the internet at my leisure and read some blogs. I thought about what I will wear when I go out for dinner tonight.
I feel grateful. So very, very, very, grateful.