watching

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I was at a friend’s house the other day. There were three mamas and six children including myself and my own. We each had a toddler and a small baby, my Pixie being the youngest of all.

At one point we were all chatting and doing our thing – all the regular things one does when one is trying to have a conversation and mind small children simultaneously, that is. I needed to go to the loo and as I walked away Pixie started squawking. One of the other mamas swooped down and placed her on their hip.

I remember at that moment somewhere in my mind noting how my friend was holding the pixie: with ease on her left hip, her left arm supporting her back and her left hand underneath Pixie’s armpit. I came home and later that afternoon found myself holding her in exactly the same way, testing out where it was comfortable on my hip, and recalling the way my friend’s arm supported her back.

It was another reminder of how we learn, as mothers. How we instinctually watch one another to find out how to do things with our babies. I mentioned this to another friend of mine over coffee on the weekend, and she nodded telling me how just the other day she had watched me sway her little seven week old babe to sleep at a barbeque at my house and had gone home to try it herself.

We lead blessed lives here in this country, but as a result of our ‘modern’ lifestyles, while we are at home, alone, parenting and raising our children, we do miss out on some of the most basic of life lessons: instinctually watching and learning from other women.

I often find myself yearning and craving contact from other women during the {sometimes long} days at home. Wise words from a mother who has done it all before me. The soft arms of another woman to hold my child while my hands are occupied elsewhere. The guidance and support and knowledge that comes from being part of group.

Tell me, do you feel it too?

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One thought on “watching

  1. So true… They had it right when they said its takes a village! Inspiration to set the time aside each week to spend time with other mum’s, to watch, to chat, to mull things over.

    As a side note – i spent considerable time after reading this post attempting to hold L as described!! Also.. My osteo gets very cranky when she hears I have been hip carrying as it apparently is throwing my hips, pelvis, back …. Everything, out!! Obviously my osteo doesn’t have children!!!

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